Fear and Loathing in Barcelona

Mia had always said that she would do any drug put in front of her so when Bambi told her that Derby Boy had got them acid, she couldn't wait.

The night started at Derby Boy´s house, the three of them were drinking and waiting for his house-mate to come home with the tabs. On arrival, they were told to take half a tab each as they were really strong and so the three of them did as they were told and waited for the trip to start. Twenty minutes later and none of them could feel a difference and so Mia and Derby Boy took another whole one and Bambi took another half. Mia´s mouth felt like cotton and she started to freak out think that she might be overdosing. After drinking five shots of tequila, they jumped into a cab and made their way to their favourite club Catwalk.

None of them knew what would happen when they started to trip, Mia was waiting for her eyes to start vibrating in her head, D.B was waiting for the numb feeling of Cocaine and Bambi was waiting for the rush of MDMA. On the way in the taxi, the three of them giggled for no reason. Inside they met up with the rest of their friends, none of them on any form of neurotics. Mia went slightly dead and the acid kicked in. Derby started to freak out and wanted to go home, the girls were enjoying themselves and told him to drink some alcohol thinking it would level him out like it normally does with Cocaine. As the trips started to get stronger, D.B freaked out even more. The girls took him to the downstairs smoking lounge, thinking it would calm him down. But being away from the loud music and bright lights didn't do him any good. Mia found herself attached to the yellow backdrop where the black paisley design kept moving in the different directions.Bambi tried to calm D.B down but he was in his own state and left the girls to go home.

When the girls returned upstairs, they were greeted by the oddest atmosphere. The music was louder than normal and Mia kept screaming really loud. All of a sudden everyone was really ugly and she couldn't understand why. Apart from her friends, everyone had distorted faces, people with long noses and small eyes. The girls saw a short fat guy and a tall skinny guy both dressed in clowns clothes and asked each other if they were really seeing the same thing. Strange things were happening and Mia was getting freaked out by an odd man who kept tapping on her shoulder all night and waving hello. She couldn´t figure out if she knew him or not.

In the toilet, the girls were mesmerized but the mirror ball on the wall, to Mia, it looked like rain and to Bambi, it looked like tears. Next came the camouflage Catwalk where everyone was wearing army clothes, the bass in the music sounded like helicopters flying above and the lights turned green. Then came aquamarine Catwalk, where she saw dolphins and other marine life floating around.

The girls continued dancing, the giggled and stared into space and experience life in a whole new way. For them, the night would getting any stranger even if they tried...this was Fear and Loathing Barcelona style.

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Mia's?

Tiger is in his early 50s. I met him one night when I was out and about in town with Boy Bank Hunk and Stoner Boy. The first night I met him, he drank my piss out of a pint glass, but hey, thats a story for another post. Over the last year, we became good friends and when I was homeless earlier on in the year before I moved back to London, he let me sleep on his couch and gave me a job where he worked. I was grateful, he was an entertaining guy but his behaviour started to worry me. He would insist on sitting next to me all the time with his arm around me, tried kissing me a few times on the lips and always wanted to hold my hand when we were walking down the street. At first I didnt think much of it, then came the phone calls. He would call me up to 15 times a day. He had nothing to say to me, he just wanted to see what I was doing. He drinks a lot you see and has a tendency to want to see me when he is.

When I moved back to London, apart from Bambi, he was the only one that called me or kept in touch. I used to look forward to his phone calls and when I moved back to Barcelona a few weeks ago, he was one of the first people I wanted to find. My new apartment wouldnt be ready for another week and he let me sleep on his floor so I wouldnt have to fork out for a hotel.

The first few days were brilliant but then he would drink and become annoying. He's an alcoholic as I mentioned and Im trying to be a good girl. In a town where the beer is cheaper than water, its easy to get hammered every day. I wanted out. I moved apartments and started work. Whenever I saw Tiger, I always made sure I spoke about men I had met whilst I was out. I hoped that he would finally understand there was no way in hell we would be together.

He knew The Womanizer and kept asking me why I didnt want to be with him when he knew he could treat me so much better than TW ever did. I politely made my excuses and avoided the topic. We went out to dinner one night where he sunk two bottles of red wine and pulled my boob out of my dress. He insisted we look like we were together when the reality of it was I looked like a whore he had got off the streets. What else would you think of an old greying man with a young good looking woman?

I flirted with the waiter and made sure Tiger saw it. He kept calling me a tart and asking me how many of the people we knew had slept with me. Over and over again I kept asking myself why I was friends with him and when he tried to make me feel like I owed him something for letting me sleep in his apartment I lost the plot.

Over the next week, I avoided his phone calls or barely spoke to him. Then one day, I went mad when I found out that he had sold my laptop for half the price because he needed money when he was meant to be looking after it. As I told my friends about what had happened I questioned myself again. Why was I friends with him?

One night I went out with a mutual friend of ours who brought along The Russian. Tiger had spoken to me about him before and I had instantly liked the sound of him. Over drinks, I fell completely head over heels in lust with him. The next day Tiger called me up to say he had heard I had met The Russian and it sounded like I had a good chance of being under him by tht end of the week.

A few days later, I called The Russian the night before my birthday and asked him if he wanted to take me out. That night, we went out with a few of my friends and eventually we decided we both wanted more. As the night turned into morning and I fell asleep in his arms, Tiger kept calling me wish me Happy Birthday. I left The Russian's house and went to go see him. As we sat down, I made it a point to get my point across that I was with someone else now and he couldnt behave the way he does.

I thought I had made myself clear when I told him I was with The Russian. He asked me whether I had fucked him and what was going on. I left quickly, telling him I had to go meet some friends. Later that afternoon, I went with The Russian and my friends to Gava, just outside of Barcelona for a party pool to celebrate my birthday. While I was there, I had 3 missed calls from Tiger.

Not sure why he was calling me, I told The Russian to pick up and talk to him. They knew each other and I explained the situation to him. He agreed with me that I wasnt imagining it and I had a right to be concerned. Over the course of the evening, he called twice again and when The Russian answered he called back again hoping to speak to me. Just before 10pm he called and asked if he could sing Happy Birthday to me down the phone. As he finished, I asked if he wanted to speak to The Russian and he hung up on me.

The next morning when I switched my phone back on, I had 4 missed calls from him. He called again a few hours later screaming down the phone for ignoring him the night before. He was drunk and couldnt understand why I was ignoring him. As I told him I was with The Russian, he flipped and started threatening to tell him lies about me and what I had been up to. This was one man who didnt like what was going on and was going to do everything to make sure I wasnt going to stay with The Russian for too long.

He just didnt get the point that he is over twice my age, is an alcoholic and will never be with me.

Who said that you had to be famous to have a stalker...has anyone else had a problem like this before?

Birthday Celebrations

The Russian was cute, I had established that. Two nights after we met and I had bumped into him again. The same with the hand on the small of my back move that made me melt. I went to bed with a smile on my face.

The night before my birthday, a Friday and no one wanted to go out, I sat and searched through my phone and called The Russian. He was busy but would call me later, within the hour, I had forgotten and got back into my PJs and curled up on the sofa. He called and I pratically jumped off my balcony with excitement.

I persuaded my housemate, Manic Depressant Girl to come with, I didnt really want to but I felt like I had to and so we went along to meet him and his friends down on the beach. He was at one end and we wanted to go to the another. They had music where we usually go and MDG got pissed off and threw a strop. It was my birthday and I was getting annoyed already. By the time we walked to where TR was, I was well and truely pissed off, not only had I walked for half an hour but I hadnt even had a drink yet. When we finally got there, the bar was about to close and we couldnt get served.

We decided to walk all the way back to where we were as they were opened until 2am. Along the way, Flash Guy called, saying he was back in town for the night since he knew it was my birthday and wanted to take me out. Flash Guy is a nice enough person but is also filthy rich and always bought Bambi and I enough alcohol to take down Africa's population of elephants in the hope that we could fall into bed with him. The honest truth is that hes ugly as sin and it would never happen. I told him I was with people and that he could come join us if he wanted, which he said he would do a bit later.

When we finally reached the beach bar where we first started, we realised that it was about to shut too, so I had now spent a good two hours walking from one place to another, trying to meet people who really should of made their way to where I was and I still hadnt had a drink. MDG decided that we should go home and pick up the camera so I would have something to remember my birthday. Again, we walked the half an hour walk home and slowly with every step, I started to hate myself for stepping foot out of my flat in the first place. I called another friend and told him to come out, now there was 2 guys and 2 girls. Hopefully I could get some alone time with The Russian and get to know him a bit better.

We left out house, camera in hand when Flash Guy called, he was at the bar I told him we were at and he was annoyed as to why we werent there anymore. I had a business proposal for him and needed to speak with him that night about it. He seemed to be more interested in getting into my knickers and when we finally got to the place I told him we were at, he had already left. Feeling like a deer in the headlights of a car, I sat there worrying how I might of potentially ruined a great opportunity to blag an easy way of making some money. For half an hour, he kept calling me, telling me to meet him in random places on the beach, when I finally found out where he was, he wanted me to drop the guys and go out with just him, his brother and MDG. I wasnt prepared to do that and so I left.

As I walked back to the group, The Russian wanted to go meet some of his friends, he was fed up with all this walking around after people and I hadnt even had a drink yet. I was close to tears and when the other two told us that they wanted to go to the strip of bars on the port, he told them we would meet up with them in half an hour.

We walked off and met his Swedish friend and his brother. All of a sudden I was standing with 7 tall, blond Swedish guys. The night had definately picked up, as The Russian spoke to them in Swedish, I wish I understood the language. He was born in Stockholm and Swedish was one of the four languages he spoke.It was just another thing to add to the long list that made him even more sexier. We went off to an after hours bar and sat next to each other, holding hands and staring at each other. The rest of the guys sat there drinking and smoking, TR whispered sweet nothings in my ear and as he saw the lust in my eyes, I reached out and kissed him.

I was melting again and I didnt know what to do next.

The One With The Hit And Run

I was too happy wasnt I? I'd finally moved back to Barcelona, got a gorgeous flat near the beach, met the most amazing guy who for once doesnt treat me like shit and then what happens? I get hit by a car.

I went out on Tuesday night with one of my girlfriends. It started off with an intercambio drinks thing in town where people meet up to pratice their Spanish and English. This was the first time we were going and I was VERY excited. Afterwards we went back to mine for dinner and then headed out to my favourite bar for a drink or two. At 2am we decided to leave and go our separate ways. As we said goodbye and I went to cross the busy road, I saw a bright light coming towards me and then bang!

I was on the floor.

I got up. Only a month earlier I had been knocked off my bike in London. I was fine, I told myself. I was more embarassed about the fact that I had been hit by a car rather than the fact that I couldnt feel the left side of my body. A crowd surrounded me, I couldnt speak. As I sat there with my head in my hands, I realised that I could of just died. Panicking I tried to think of who to call....and thats when it hit me. No one. Im all alone in this town. Bambi's in Ibiza, I dont talk to The Womanizer or any of his friends anymore and Ive decided to cut Tiger out of my life. I called The Russian, crying down the phone, I told him I'd just been hit by a car.

Shocked, he said he would be there ASAP, he was on the other side of town where he had just moved to and I knew he had a busy week ahead of him. As I sat there, surrounded by a group of Catalan people looking after me, I felt an sudden urge of homesickness coming on. I didnt understand a word anyone was saying, a man sitting next to me kept freaking out and wanted me to go somewhere with him. I thought it might of been the driver but later got told he had already driven off after he had hit me. As the police and ambulance turned up, I spotted The Russian walking towards us. The look of shock on his face said it all, I had cuts all over my arms and face and I was bleeding everywhere.

As they wheeled me off into the ambulance, I saw him telling me to answer my phone. Within seconds he was calling asking where they were taking me so they could follow. It was now just past half 2 and he looked shattered. I told him to go home, I was gonna be a while, I needed x rays done on my jaw and leg. I needed to be cleaned up and as he argued his case, I realised how unbelievably amazing he really was. This was a man I had only met a mere week ago, a man that I had only really spent 2 days with before the accident and yet here he was trying to look after me. Any of my ex's would of run half a mile in the opposite direction. The irony of it all was that The Russian would always cross the street making sure he was in the direction of the oncoming traffic with one arm on my back and the other holding my hand.

As I sat in the hospital wondering my fate, he texted me every half an hour to see if there was any progress, eventually he fell asleep and when I left I texted him what had happened. At half 6, I hopped out the hospital with a broken meta tarsal in my left ankle, damaged tendons and cuts and bruises.

Yesterday was spent at home, pretending to work but getting bored by the lack of freedom. Watching back to back DVDs and bitching about the fact that I couldnt eat because of my locked jaw. My desire for food has gone out the window and for the first time in 5 years I smoked weed hoping it would make me feel hungry.

Unfortunately I now have a job where if I dont come in, the whole place falls apart. This morning I had to come in, not only because Im needed but also because I need to pay the rent at the end of the month. I cant walk properly, I can barely walk and I came in stoned and have continued to smoke at my desk.

Im drugged up on a mixture of meds, making sure I dont have some freak OD and earlier in the day I was thinking about topping myself off. I finish work in 10 minutes and Im hoping tomorrow isnt that bad.

Whereever the bastard is that hit me and ran, I hope hes burning in hell.

Alex The Cocaine Dealer Pt 2

Alex and the boys had a long history of trouble. The boys had gone into his offices and destroyed the place and in response, Alex had sent the local mafia to break The Womanizers legs. Time had passed and the boys had put all this business behind them...that was all until all hell broke loose when I attacked Alex.

By the time I got out of the bath, The Womanizer and Bambi were in the bedroom, sat on the bed talking. The smile on her face told me things were good and I shouldnt worry about my future with him. After I changed, I walked into the living room to find more people had arrived with more drugs and more drink. The party was well and truly under way and at half 8 in the morning, where most people were on their way to work, this lot were only just getting started.

The thing with drug taking is, when you stopped and take yourself out of the zone, no matter how long for, whether its 5 minutes or 5 hours, we dont want to get back into it when you see the way everyone else is behaving. Instead of sitting down with the rest of them, I went back into the bedroom and asked if I could get into bed while Bambi and TW chilled out. Within 5 minutes, Alex had walked in and got into bed with me. I sat in silence while the other two looked over and TW asked me if I was okay. Replying I was tired and needed to sleep, I asked Alex if he minded leaving so I could sleep. He wouldnt listen to neither my pleeds or TW's so when he pushed himself on me, I flipped.

Having grown up with an abusive step-dad I wasnt scared of being attacked by a man and knowing that TW was only inches away gave me the strength and stupidity to tell Alex to fuck off before I bitch slapped him. Within seconds, he flipped and started screaming he wanted money for his drugs. Back at the house I hadnt done anything and so I walked off into the living room where the rest of the boys were. Alex came following me in and grab me by the neck and pushed me up against the wall, telling me he would kill me unless I gave him €50.

BBH intervined and pushed Alex aside while Swedish Boy handed him over his last €50 which he was meant to use to get to the airport. Shaken by what had just happened, I walked back into the bedroom, half fuming, half teary. Not wanting them to see how upset I was, I sat on the bed with my back to the door. Bambi made the mistake of walking out into the living room and got caught in the middle. Alex threatened to kill her and she broke down. Furniture was thrown around and BBH gave Alex his €3,000 jacket and told him to fuck off and leave.

Meanwhile, in the bedroom, The Womanizer tried to persuad me into bed but I wasnt having any of it. Bambi and Swedish Boy left to go home so he could pack his stuff and I sat down with The Womanizer and wondered what I was doing with him.

Alex The Cocaine Dealer Pt 1

One night, Bambi, Boy Bank Hunk and I were out with a few other people. We were in our usual Tuesday night spot, drinking, dancing and coked off our faces. Everything was normal, until we needed more drugs. Bambi ran off to find a dealer as it was her forte to do and I went to go see him and make the exchange. He led me and another girl, whom he said was his girlfriend into the bathroom and took the bag out. He racked up three lines and afterwards shoved his tongue down my mouth. Being in a small cubicle with two other people and grams of cocaine in my pocket meant that I couldn't do much, so I made my excuses and left. A few hours later and Boy Bank Hunk wants us and Swedish Boy to come back to the flat he shared with The Womanizer and continue with the party.

As we got ready to get into the car, BBH spotted Alex, the dealer I had met in the toilet earlier. He told him to jump in the cab with us and come back for the party. At the flat, TW was asleep and was soon woken up by BBH. When he finally walked into the room, in a half woken trance, he said hello to everyone but me. It had been just over 2 weeks since he told me there was no room for me in his life and I had no intentions of speaking to him. As everyone sat around drinking endless shots of vodka, smoking and snorting the heaps on cocaine everywhere, I sat with Swedish Boy. Although I had only known him for 2 weeks, we had bonded very closely as friends and he was due to go back to Sweden to be with his girlfriend. Bambi was sitting on the other side of the room with The Womanizer and BBH had fallen asleep, in need of a power nap.

Eventually TW came over and said hello and tried to grab some attention but at this point, I was too busy trying to shove as much shit up my nose as I could that I didnt care. In the kitchen, Alex and his helper has raked up line after line and decided to start their morning distribution gig which they would of done if they were at home. I sat in the corner, watching them, being polite and asking questions about where they were from and how they know the boys. Alex made it clear that he was interested in Bambi earlier in the night and when she had refused his advances, he turned his attention onto me.

Seeing the fact that I was in TW's flat, steps away from the bed we used to sleep in and seconds away from him in the other room, I freaked out when Alex tried to kiss me again. I made my excuses and left the room. He followed me and pinned me up against the wall, kissing my neck, trying to get me worked up. As I pushed him away, I told him I was with someone else and he should leave me alone. I went off and sat with Swedish Boy while Alex went over and spoke to The Womanizer.

Apparently Alex asked TW what was the quickest way of getting me into bed to which TW replied it wasn't going to happen so he should just leave me alone. Alex walked off in a mood and I told TW I was tired and was going to take a bath. While I was soaking in poor heaven of fluffy bubbles and wetness, Alex had tried to hit on Bambi again and asked TW why she had knocked him back again. The Womanizer replied he didn't know but threw in that he had slept with Bambi in the summer and that he had been with me for the last few months.

What neither of the boys had told us was how they knew Alex and how what The Womanizer had just said was going to change the whole mood of the night.

I should of just stayed in that bath really.

Dont You Have A Girlfriend?

Mia had moved in with Bambi who made her realise that she was completely crazy about TW. They both started to go out with Stoner Boy and Boy Band Hunk every night and even though TW never came out, Mia would think of him. One night, after a very messy session, they all went back to the flat. It had been nearly two and a half week since they had last seen each other, the longest they had gone since they met. Mia ignored TW for a while, deciding that he wasn’t worth her time. Eventually they were packed into the bedroom and they tried talking things through. Mia was determined not to give into and jump into bed with him. Things were made more complicated when she had pissed off Alex, the coke dealer they had brought home with them from the club. Before they knew it, the boys had to go to work but told the girls to stay for a bit and chill out.

At 8pm, TW came home to find Mia and Bambi in his bed passed out, he was meant to be having dinner with his girlfriend but instead had come home to drop off a bottle of Vodka for BBH and his friends. Mia cracked the bottle open and was soon very drunk, having not had anything to eat. TW’s girlfriend had called him up screaming demanding to know why he had stood her up and BBH had come home alone. The four of them continued drinking and Mia soon decided that she needed some bedroom action and stood there completely naked apart from a bed sheet covering her ordering TW take her in the bedroom. They say absence really makes the heart fonder and it was definitely the case, for 6 hours they didn’t leave the bedroom and finally passed out at 8am, only to be woken up by TW’s girlfriend calling him saying she wanted to meet him.

The next day, BBH had been in the bar Mia was working in and got very drunk, he went home and put his hand through a table and got into an argument with TW. As Mia was getting into the lift to go up to the boy's flat, she saw TW coming downstairs telling her she wasn’t going up there. As they walked down the street, she wondered where he was going and asked him if he needed to use her phone to call someone. It was half 5 in the morning and she had to find a cab and go home. She couldn’t believe it when he asked if he could stay over. He had a girlfriend who lived down the road and friends all over the city and yet he wanted to stay with her. They went home and fell asleep. The next day when they woke, she thought he would leave but he didn’t. He stayed with her all weekend, turned his phone off and chilled out. People where calling her trying to find out where he was but she just told them she didn’t have a clue. She found it really peculiar how they were calling her and not his girlfriend. On Monday morning, he left her and went home.

She knew he was moving house that week and was hoping that they would talk about what was going on between but things changed like she could never imagine and before she knew it, she had pressed the self-destruct button

Are we, Arent we?

STOP PRESS: Mia is currently sitting on her balcony, over looking Barcelona's Gran Via. Yes, after a month of umm-ing and aaah-ing, she finally packed her bags and left. She hopes you enjoy her posts while she is here as much as you did while she was in London.

Stoner Boy’s brother had come over from Australia for the week and had planned a massive party. Mia had turned up at the bar to meet the two brothers alongside Boy Band Hunk. The guys treated her like one of the gang and didn’t mention The Womanizer. In the middle of their pub crawl, TW turned up and demanded to know why she was out with his friends. They got into an argument and Mia told him to fuck himself. Deep down inside she knew that he had fallen for her feisty attitude and no bullshit approach. TW disappeared for a few hours, only to reappear when they were at a club. Mia had just met Bambi and was enjoying the company of all of Stoner Boy’s friends. She was drunk and coked up and didn’t care what TW thought and continued to grind with every cute guy in sight and making sure he could see it.

At the end of the night, when they were all sat outside deciding what to do next, she kept getting asking by everyone where TW was. She had no idea and when she went to go find him; she found him sitting in the corner of the club with a friend talking business. She told him that everyone was waiting for him and said goodbye. He told her to go to his flat and that he would be around in a bit but when she got there, the flat was occupied by the boys getting drunk and being loud. She wasn’t in the mood and ended up going home and having a bath. When she got out of the bath, she saw she had a miss call from TW. She called him back and asked what he wanted. He told her to get into a cab and come see him now.

When she got there, she was greeted by Boy Bank Hunk who told her that she should go into the bedroom and talk to TW about their feelings for each other. Still confused by what was going on, she went and sat in bed with him, wondering what BBH was talking about. He asked her what she wanted and whether she wanted to be with him. She wasn’t sure if he was trying to tell her how he felt about her or if he was trying to find out how she was feeling so he could get rid of her. At the end of the conversion, he told her that he was becoming addicted to her and that he wasn’t going to leave his girlfriend and they should stop seeing each other. She left and didn’t see him for another two week in which she tried to forget about him. She had a threesome with two of her friends and still drunk afterwards texted him telling him how much she wished it was him she was fucking rather than someone else.

What she hadnt realised is how much emotion that one text evoked from TW and how she wouldnt stop hearing about it for weeks to come