DISCLAIMER: PLEASE READ

All Characters In This Said Piece Are Factual And Although You Might Not Be Named (And Righty So Shamed) You Are A Force To Be Reckoned In My Story.

Having Said That, Unless You Still Receive 3am Drunken Love Poems Via Electronic Mediums, You Were Unfortunately Just A Spur Of the Moment Obessession. Get.Over.It. Love. Bitterness And Angry Aint Pretty. Be Happy You Are Being Acknowledged.

No Men Were Intentially Or (That) Severly Injuried In The Events Of This Blog. Most Of You Asked For It And Enjoyed The Best Part Of The Experience.

As A Wise Man Once Said, What's Life Without Pain?

Saturday 1 August 2009

Nor Here Nor There

I moved to Barcelona last wednesday. Did you know that? It was possibly one of the most difficult decisions I have made in my life, possibly more difficult than deciding to move here in the first place. You see, I moved to Barcelona last June. I met The Womanizer, I drank too much, partied too much, did way too many drugs and the only way to get away from him and all the madness was to move back to London. Did it work? Did it fuck.

After promising my family I wouldnt ever move back here, I left without saying goodbye and jumped on the plane. I havent spoke to my parents since. The truth is, when you immigrate from your own country and move to somewhere where the cultural shock is completely opposite to where you grew up, its very hard to go back to what you knew.

After spending 10 months in Spain where time is no concept and you can get hamburgers and beer at half 6 in the morning on the way to work, to moving to London where you have to be in a restaurant by half 9 to get a meal was a major shocker. All my friends had stayed in the same little circle, going to the shitty local clubs, falling out of cabs and into arms of strangers. Whereas as I had seen more to the world, saw countless sunrises on the Med, met stunningly gorgeous men, partied til I couldnt take anymore, explored Gaudi, ate Paella with the locals and made a complete nuisance of myself.

The reality of it was, I outgrew where I came from. I made mistakes, I fell for the wrong guy, I made myself ill by doing too many drugs, I made friends, I lost friends, I starved, I cried, I laughed but most of all, I lived. The six or so months I was in London, I wasnt living. I was exisitng. I was trying to pretend to be something and someone I wasnt and it drove me insane.

For the first time this year, I am free from any man in my life, free to any judgements made by family members and it feels fantastic. I´ve always thought of London as home. I am and always will be a proud Londoner, born and breed but when I stepped off that plane late last Wednesday night, I realised for now, Barcelona is more home than anywhere else.

Until my next post, hasta pronto!

STOP PRESS*** August only means one thing...my birthday is around the corner. Next Saturdays post will be a personal inside to moi (of course!) so you can ask me anything you wish. Remember, thats only another 8 days to go. You can either leave your question(s) - there are no limits in the comments below or email me at missmiadickinsonATgmailDOTcom.



9 comments:

ScoMan said...

Personally, I'm happy to just exist. Living seems like a hell of a lot of work and I just don't have the energy.

Good on you for choosing to live the way you want to live though. Very courageous of you.

Miss OverThinker said...

I can totally relate to "when you immigrate from your own country .....it's hard go back to what you knew".. since I am in a similar situation.. I could never go back to where I came from (India) but I don't know if I fit in completely here either.. Parts of me fit in my home country, other parts are better off in Canada.. in a way I am a perpetual outsider..

BTW, very beautifully written post.. :)

Gorilla Bananas said...

I'm glad you're feeling at home there, Mia. I hope the job is going well too.

Mia Dickinson said...

@ScoMan - Surely theres more to life than shower,shit and shave, 9-5 slaving over a desk, Marks and Spencers dinner for one and falling asleep infront of the TV with your hands down your pants. You need to get more and explore the world!!

@Rookie Blogger - I can imagine you know how I feel. I sometimes get very homesick and wish I was back in London but its usually when Im missing home comforts such as food we cant get over here. Other than that, I can speak to my friends on FB and watch TV on the internet.

@GB - Havent started work yet, been relaxing and trying to settle in first but it looks very promising. I am a very happy girly here

Sam said...

"Confessions Of A Social Whore"
"she likes to keep busy by corrupting innocent 18 year olds, battling her addiction to badboys and the search for Mr. Right Now Email"

I feel a kinship with you. :P

Auri said...

What a beautiful post! You sound so happy. I've never been to Barcelona but my dad tells me he loves it as much as Rome (which is saying a lot). I'll have to visit someday!!
Mwah, love you!!

Ashly Star said...

What a great post. =) You sound like you're in a better place mentally and emotionally.

I just moved from one state back to my home state. Such a scary and rough decision but so glad I did it.

Take care of yourself! =D

Mia Dickinson said...

@Selena - Thank you very much, welcome to the mad world of Mia and her antics :)

@Auri - I highly recommend coming here and when u do, you have a place to stay. Ive never been to Rome but if I ever leave this town, it will only be for Rome. Love you too

@Amorous - Thanks hun. Moving anywhere is hard and its a constant battle trying to decide between whats the right thing to do and what makes you happy. Unfortunately sometimes, that isnt always the same thing!

Mia Dickinson said...

@Selena - Thank you very much, welcome to the mad world of Mia and her antics :)

@Auri - I highly recommend coming here and when u do, you have a place to stay. Ive never been to Rome but if I ever leave this town, it will only be for Rome. Love you too

@Amorous - Thanks hun. Moving anywhere is hard and its a constant battle trying to decide between whats the right thing to do and what makes you happy. Unfortunately sometimes, that isnt always the same thing!