DISCLAIMER: PLEASE READ

All Characters In This Said Piece Are Factual And Although You Might Not Be Named (And Righty So Shamed) You Are A Force To Be Reckoned In My Story.

Having Said That, Unless You Still Receive 3am Drunken Love Poems Via Electronic Mediums, You Were Unfortunately Just A Spur Of the Moment Obessession. Get.Over.It. Love. Bitterness And Angry Aint Pretty. Be Happy You Are Being Acknowledged.

No Men Were Intentially Or (That) Severly Injuried In The Events Of This Blog. Most Of You Asked For It And Enjoyed The Best Part Of The Experience.

As A Wise Man Once Said, What's Life Without Pain?

Saturday, 19 September 2009

Whose the daddy?

Mia was having trouble at home, she didnt want to live there anymore but wasnt stable enough to manage by herself. Although at first The Only Indian In The Village had been there for her, their relationship soon turned sour and one morning Mia decided to end their relationship. It was then that she called his best friend whom she had grown close to for comfort. She had also had a thing for him and they decided to meet up the next day.

Mia wasnt sure what she was doing but somehow ended up in London's Bushy Park. In the midst of tears and angry, she found herself losing her virginity to the man she had wanted for so long. In retrospect, Mia laughs at the thought of losing it in one of the Royal Parks in front of a deer but it only lasted 3 seconds and was memorial for all the wrong reasons. Clearly, not prepared for it, they didnt use any protection and on the way home, Mia freaked out and went on the hunt for the morning after pill. Those days, it was still two pills and Mia took one and hide the other and went back out again to tell her best friend about her day.

A few days later, she went out with Virginity Boy and got so drunk she didnt make it home, scared at the reaction of her parents, she decided not to go home at all and her mother along with her Godmother went through her room and found the morning after pill. When Mia finally came home after a week of sleeping on friends floors, she was confronted by her whole family who decided that she was to quit college and stop going to the town all together where she was studying. Her phone was confiscated and she wasnt allowed to go anywhere unless there was a family member with her.

Mia was pissed off and fed up with her family controlling her life all the time, she decided to finally get her own back and went through her parents paper work while they were away, there had to be some dirt somewhere and she was planning on using it against them but what she found out was something she didnt know how to deal with...

Not only had her mother been previously married, Mia had a biological brother and was a whole year older than she thought she was.

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

This is now, that was then pt 2

Mia moved to a whole new neighbourhood and couldnt wait to start her new life. At college, she was a whole new person, no one knew her as the tomboy from college. At 16, she was 3 years younger than all of her friends and it wasnt long before she was spending all her time in the local pub. She liked the new freedom she had, although her parents kept tabs on where she went, she realised that between the hours of 9 and 6, she could do whatever she wanted.

She started drinking, normally from 11am until 5pm, when she had to leave and get the bus home. For 6 months, she hid the fact she wasnt going to college from her parents. It wasnt like school anymore and she didnt HAVE to go in, the teachers never harassed her and in some of her lessons, she would go in drunk. In fact, she was drunk in most of her ICT lesson and actually made more sense than when she was sober. She started smoking, possibly to despite her parents and to annoy her father who also smoked.

Until this point, she had never had any guys show interest in her but now, men were coming from left, right and center. She didnt tell anyone she was still a virgin, she hadnt even kissed a boy and went along with stories of pure filth that made everyone think she was some kind of Sex Goddess. Soon came the time when everyone started to fool around with each other and Mia, being at that age she was, wanted to lose her virginity and get it over and done with.

Earlier in the year, she had stopped a tall, blonde, blue eyed boy in the street and exchanged numbers, months later, they bumped into each other and began drinking in the same pub. The boy was a douchebag but Mia soon started to feel stronger for him than any of the others in the group. They would hang out together but he had other things in mind and would constantly be hooking up with other girls. Confused by his actions, Mia decided to go out with his best friend, The Only Indian In The Village. He was not a good looking boy but gave Mia some form of comfort and security. He worked full time as well as studied, although he did the studying less than often and gave Mia her own credit card.

Soon her parents caught wind of what was going on and contacted her college tutor to find out what was happened, when he informed her that she had been skipping college, her parents had her followed for 2 weeks to find out what was really happening. One evening, Mia's father took her mobile phone, her passport and her bank card and told her she was not going to college again. She was housebound and he beat her up so bad that she couldnt walk up the stairs. The next morning, she woke up to be told that she would be driven into college, where she would empty out her locker and inform her tutors she would be returning.

Inside the college, she found one of her friends, whom she persuaded to help her sneek out the back entrance and so she ran, to The Only Indian In The Village's work and told him what happened. For the rest of the day, she hid from her parents and stayed at a friends house trying to figure out what to do with her life. Her parents had contacted the local police saying she had been kidnapped by some guy she knew and they were worried about her and so the next day she had to return to the police station and meet her parents.

Inside the station, her mother whisped to her in Hindi that if she didnt go along with the fact that everything was okay at home, the authorities would put her into a foster home and she wouldnt have anyone left in the world that cared about her. Mia was scared, she didnt want to be alone. She just didnt want to feel like a prison in her own home. She wanted her mother to open her eyes to her father's cheating, lies and violent beatings towards her. She wanted her father to stop being such a bastard and learn to love her but most of all, Mia just wanted to be happy but then again, you cant always have what you want and she was going to learn the hard way...

The biggest bombshell of her life was going to rock her to her very soul.

Sunday, 13 September 2009

This is now...that was then pt 1

Mia has been struggling with what to write about...you see, she´s already told you about her love for toxic men who drive her to insanity with the urge of intense passion and she left it with the story of The Womanizer. She could not go back to being in London for a few months and tell you how she dealt with being constantly depressed, couldnt get out of bed and finally ruined whatever was left of her relationship with The Spartan but to understand where she is now, you have to know what happened before.


This is the story of Mia.


Mia had an awakard childhood, her parents divorced before she was born and her mother never told her father that she was pregnant, instead she married a man who never accepted Mia as his own daughter. Her older brother was sent to live with her biological father, both of whom she didnt meet until she was 17. Memories of Mia´s early childhood are sweet, her maternal grandmother brought her up while both parents were at work. Mia was a naughty child, constantly running away, causing havoc and never listening to elders, somethings havent changed to this day. It was only when Mia reached the age of puberty that things really changed. Her step-father started to punish her for the smallest things, first came the constant shouting, then the military style movements, making her stand crouched down, holding her ears through her legs, giving pain through out her body and finally the beating. The beatings were the worse and only ended two years ago when she woke up one day and realised that he would kill her unless he had her arrested.


Mia hated the way she was treated at home by her father and stopped eating. Now as a young woman she has realised that this was the only way she could control her life. After constantly being told she was ugly, she seeked comfort in tracksuit bottoms and baggy t-shirts. She spent hours in the local park, playing football and trying to become one of the boys. At school she was teased for having a hairy upper lip, something that constantly troubled her and meant everyone would laugh and point at her and although some of the boys were close friends to her, she never once had a boy interested in her.


As she grew older and into her teenage years, she persuaded her mum to try and help improve the situation and get rid of her hairy lip and buy some girly clothes but that didnt work. She coudnt get rid of the image everyone had of her. The beatings got worse, Mia made stories up of how she had been in fights in the local park to cover up what was going on at home. She grew more and more angry and would start fights with anyone she could at school. She was more and more troubled and felt no love in her life.


Her parents marriage was in pieces after her father was made redudant and her mother found out that he was having an affair with another woman that he worked with. An affair which 18 years on is still continuing and Mia is finding it hard to accept the actions of both her parents and has realised that affects her relationships to this day. Instead of finding another job, her father decided to sit at home and play with her mother´s hard earned cash on the stock markets. At this point in their life, Mia´s mother had a stable, well paying job that provided for the whole family and neither Mia or her brothers ever felt like they were in any financial trouble but whenever her father would lose the money, he would kick off and make a very public scene and Mia´s mother would finally give in. The end result was Mia´s mother having to give in and re-mortaging the house and finally selling it so they could make ends meet.


A week before Mia´s 16th birthday, they moved an hour away to a nice, white, middle class area away from anyone they knew and down the road from Mia´s brothers´ public school. Mia was to start college in September and her Godfather had said he would pay for her brother to go school until he was 18. Mia made the mistake of thing that moving to a new area would be a fresh new start...but the move only just made things worse and there would be no more stability in her life for a while.

Monday, 7 September 2009

Drama is my middle name pt 2

Mia had been enjoying life apart from the stalker like housemate, she had decided to detach herself from the situation. Weekdays were spent working two jobs and weekends were spent with The Russian. The small moments of quietness they shared was exactly what Mia had been longing for.


One weekend when Mia knew MDG was going to Costa Brava, she took The Russian home. For two days they sat in their own love nest until MDG came home early and ruined the party. Instead of letting them be, she said an argument with Mia that caused her to get upset. You see, Mia had bought 100e worth of food which she cooked for both of them while she was under the impression that MDG would pay for half since she cant cook. Then when it came to going shopping again, MDG went by herself and only bought food for 2 days and not for Mia as well. The day before she went to Costa Brava, the two girls went shopping together and bought food which was paid by MDG. Mia thought it was fair that this happened since the bill only came to 20e. While she was away, Mia cooked dinner for herself and The Russian only using half of the ingredients that had bought. Back on arrival, MDG, more than likely being pissed off at seeing someone else happy hit the roof.


Finally after handing her 50e Mia and The Russian went to bed to avoid anymore arguments, it was another 4 days before the girls say each other and when they did, MDG was in the living room crying. Mia wanted to comfort her but as she did, MDG threw a plate on the floor and Mia realised it wasnt worth the hassel.


Later that weekend, after a long night at work, Mia came home at 2am to have a shower and get ready to meet The Russian. When she walked thru the door, she saw a naked MDG on the living room sofa, drunk and stoned. Confused as to what she should do, Mia decided to leave it and went out. When she finally came home, at midday on Sunday, MDG was still on the sofa, hoping that she would retire to her bedroom, Mia was annoyed that she decided to stay with the couple in the living room. Mia was drunk and she had had her first fight with The Russian which led to her crying. She really wanted some alone time and tried to get the point across. After 3 hours of listening to MDG´s drunken rants, they went to bed. When they awoke at 10pm, she was gone and the couple settled down, ate dinner and watched TV before heading back to bed at 1 am. MDG came home drunk at half 4 and woke Mia and The Russian up by banging on their bedroom door loudly. Slightly panicking that something must be wrong, Mia stumbled into the living room to find a naked MDG throwing furniture around because there was no bottled water in the fridge. Confused at why it was her problem, Mia handed her 5e and went back to bed.

For the next few days, Mia avoided MDG and came home late after she knew that she would be in bed. Mia was confused as to whether she should stay in the apartment or move out, MDG woke Mia up at6am on the day the rent needed to be paid and started screaming at her. If its one thing Mia hates, its been woken up. When she finally woke up later that morning, Mia couldnt decide whether she wanted to pay another months rent and stay in the apartment, she went to help her photographer friend on a photoshoot and spoke to her boss. Still uncertain, she was enraged by the endless abusive messages and constant phone calls from MDG.

After two hours of avoiding all contact, Mia was shocked when she received a voicemail saying MDG had changed the locks and Mia had until 11pm to come back and pick her clothes up and move apartments. It was all Mia needed, some more unstability in her life.

Unsure of what to do, Mia went back to the photographer's house and stayed the night, planning to go back to the apartment when she had calmed down in the morning but when she did, she realised that MDG had changed the locks. After calling Bambi in Ibiza, Mia decided to borrow a ladder from the corner shop and break the front window and get her stuff back. Not only was she going to get her stuff back, she was also going to trash the place and show the bitch. Unfortunately, the ladder was too short and as Mia was walking back to return the ladder, MDG walked up to her and realised what Mia was planning to do.

After a good 10 minute bitch fest in the street, MDG finally let Mia in the flat where she packed her stuff and left. It took all her strength to stop herself from MDG, Mia was tempted to floor her after she had all her stuff out but decided against it...she had better plans for MDG.

Friday, 4 September 2009

Drama is my middle name

Mia has been quite absent from the blogger world recently, why? I hear you ask yourself...what happened to her? Nothing. She has just been finding it very hard to concentrate on writing and couldnt decide in which direction to go to next. You see, drama follows Mia wherever she goes and before where shes buzzed off the drama, she is now sick of it and wants to quit all of it. Currently so much is going on in her life and yet nothing is happening at all. She is refusing to open up too much about her relationship with The Russian purely on the basis that a few people in town (mostly The Womanizer - does that man ever quit) have tried to break them up already and although it has been merely a month, Mia has a very soft spot for her man and doesnt wish to ruin things.

This week has been especially challenging for Mia. For the last 3 weeks, she has been dealing with constant issues with her throat and has been unable to get rid of an awful cough. Her immune system has been weakened after years of drug abuse and working two jobs leaving her only 6 hours to herself has been driving her mad. As much as she is enjoying life for once, walking around with a big smile on her face that cant be wiped off, she has avoided going home. You see Mia moved in with a girl that used to see her best friend Chris. Chris passed away suddenly in April this year and when Mia came back to Barcelona, she offered comfort to this girl but what Mia didnt know was this girl was Manic Depressant. After all the trials and tribunals of last year and being homeless for 2/3 of it, Mia wanted to live with someone she knew so when MDG said that she had a free room, Mia jumped at the chance. The flat was in an amazing location, a 10 minute way from the beach, the clubs and the center of the city. Inside, it was clean, fresh and modern. One of the most stunning places she had seen in Barcelona. The rent was cheap and it finally gave her the freedom of living her life without worrying about any uncertainities. The first two weeks were a dream, Mia´s best friend from Sweden had come over and they were partying all the time but then all of a sudden, Mia was involved in a hit and run and had to stay at home for a week. Determined not to be confined to her flat for the whole time her friend was here, she rested during the days and (carefully) partied during the evenings. It meant that she was seeing less of MDG which she didnt think would be a problem...but it was.

First came the constant chating on Facebook Chat, the odd emails asking Mia if she was missing her. Then came the texts demanding to know where shes was and when she was coming home. MDG refused to eat unless Mia was at home and cooked. Mia started to feel a little bit confused by this behaviour. Whenever Mia took MDG she would complain and throw a strop like a child, not the 31 year old woman she was. Mia spoke to other friends that knew her and they all told her that her Brazilian housemate was insane and needed help. Then came the drug abuse, MDG would randomly disappear in the late evening and come home in the early hours, usually with one of The Womanizer´s friends and shag him on the sofa. One night, Mia has enough when she walked into the living room in need of the toilet and saw two figures at it on the sofa.

Mia tried to understand, MDG was struggling with Chris´death and Mia felt that she had a duty to uphold but she was wondering how much more she could put with...only time will tell

Friday, 28 August 2009

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Mia's?

Tiger is in his early 50s. I met him one night when I was out and about in town with Boy Bank Hunk and Stoner Boy. The first night I met him, he drank my piss out of a pint glass, but hey, thats a story for another post. Over the last year, we became good friends and when I was homeless earlier on in the year before I moved back to London, he let me sleep on his couch and gave me a job where he worked. I was grateful, he was an entertaining guy but his behaviour started to worry me. He would insist on sitting next to me all the time with his arm around me, tried kissing me a few times on the lips and always wanted to hold my hand when we were walking down the street. At first I didnt think much of it, then came the phone calls. He would call me up to 15 times a day. He had nothing to say to me, he just wanted to see what I was doing. He drinks a lot you see and has a tendency to want to see me when he is.

When I moved back to London, apart from Bambi, he was the only one that called me or kept in touch. I used to look forward to his phone calls and when I moved back to Barcelona a few weeks ago, he was one of the first people I wanted to find. My new apartment wouldnt be ready for another week and he let me sleep on his floor so I wouldnt have to fork out for a hotel.

The first few days were brilliant but then he would drink and become annoying. He's an alcoholic as I mentioned and Im trying to be a good girl. In a town where the beer is cheaper than water, its easy to get hammered every day. I wanted out. I moved apartments and started work. Whenever I saw Tiger, I always made sure I spoke about men I had met whilst I was out. I hoped that he would finally understand there was no way in hell we would be together.

He knew The Womanizer and kept asking me why I didnt want to be with him when he knew he could treat me so much better than TW ever did. I politely made my excuses and avoided the topic. We went out to dinner one night where he sunk two bottles of red wine and pulled my boob out of my dress. He insisted we look like we were together when the reality of it was I looked like a whore he had got off the streets. What else would you think of an old greying man with a young good looking woman?

I flirted with the waiter and made sure Tiger saw it. He kept calling me a tart and asking me how many of the people we knew had slept with me. Over and over again I kept asking myself why I was friends with him and when he tried to make me feel like I owed him something for letting me sleep in his apartment I lost the plot.

Over the next week, I avoided his phone calls or barely spoke to him. Then one day, I went mad when I found out that he had sold my laptop for half the price because he needed money when he was meant to be looking after it. As I told my friends about what had happened I questioned myself again. Why was I friends with him?

One night I went out with a mutual friend of ours who brought along The Russian. Tiger had spoken to me about him before and I had instantly liked the sound of him. Over drinks, I fell completely head over heels in lust with him. The next day Tiger called me up to say he had heard I had met The Russian and it sounded like I had a good chance of being under him by tht end of the week.

A few days later, I called The Russian the night before my birthday and asked him if he wanted to take me out. That night, we went out with a few of my friends and eventually we decided we both wanted more. As the night turned into morning and I fell asleep in his arms, Tiger kept calling me wish me Happy Birthday. I left The Russian's house and went to go see him. As we sat down, I made it a point to get my point across that I was with someone else now and he couldnt behave the way he does.

I thought I had made myself clear when I told him I was with The Russian. He asked me whether I had fucked him and what was going on. I left quickly, telling him I had to go meet some friends. Later that afternoon, I went with The Russian and my friends to Gava, just outside of Barcelona for a party pool to celebrate my birthday. While I was there, I had 3 missed calls from Tiger.

Not sure why he was calling me, I told The Russian to pick up and talk to him. They knew each other and I explained the situation to him. He agreed with me that I wasnt imagining it and I had a right to be concerned. Over the course of the evening, he called twice again and when The Russian answered he called back again hoping to speak to me. Just before 10pm he called and asked if he could sing Happy Birthday to me down the phone. As he finished, I asked if he wanted to speak to The Russian and he hung up on me.

The next morning when I switched my phone back on, I had 4 missed calls from him. He called again a few hours later screaming down the phone for ignoring him the night before. He was drunk and couldnt understand why I was ignoring him. As I told him I was with The Russian, he flipped and started threatening to tell him lies about me and what I had been up to. This was one man who didnt like what was going on and was going to do everything to make sure I wasnt going to stay with The Russian for too long.

He just didnt get the point that he is over twice my age, is an alcoholic and will never be with me.

Who said that you had to be famous to have a stalker...has anyone else had a problem like this before?

Tuesday, 18 August 2009

Birthday Celebrations

The Russian was cute, I had established that. Two nights after we met and I had bumped into him again. The same with the hand on the small of my back move that made me melt. I went to bed with a smile on my face.

The night before my birthday, a Friday and no one wanted to go out, I sat and searched through my phone and called The Russian. He was busy but would call me later, within the hour, I had forgotten and got back into my PJs and curled up on the sofa. He called and I pratically jumped off my balcony with excitement.
I persuaded my housemate, Manic Depressant Girl to come with, I didnt really want to but I felt like I had to and so we went along to meet him and his friends down on the beach. He was at one end and we wanted to go to the another. They had music where we usually go and MDG got pissed off and threw a strop. It was my birthday and I was getting annoyed already. By the time we walked to where TR was, I was well and truely pissed off, not only had I walked for half an hour but I hadnt even had a drink yet. When we finally got there, the bar was about to close and we couldnt get served.
We decided to walk all the way back to where we were as they were opened until 2am. Along the way, Flash Guy called, saying he was back in town for the night since he knew it was my birthday and wanted to take me out. Flash Guy is a nice enough person but is also filthy rich and always bought Bambi and I enough alcohol to take down Africa's population of elephants in the hope that we could fall into bed with him. The honest truth is that hes ugly as sin and it would never happen. I told him I was with people and that he could come join us if he wanted, which he said he would do a bit later.
When we finally reached the beach bar where we first started, we realised that it was about to shut too, so I had now spent a good two hours walking from one place to another, trying to meet people who really should of made their way to where I was and I still hadnt had a drink. MDG decided that we should go home and pick up the camera so I would have something to remember my birthday. Again, we walked the half an hour walk home and slowly with every step, I started to hate myself for stepping foot out of my flat in the first place. I called another friend and told him to come out, now there was 2 guys and 2 girls. Hopefully I could get some alone time with The Russian and get to know him a bit better.
We left out house, camera in hand when Flash Guy called, he was at the bar I told him we were at and he was annoyed as to why we werent there anymore. I had a business proposal for him and needed to speak with him that night about it. He seemed to be more interested in getting into my knickers and when we finally got to the place I told him we were at, he had already left. Feeling like a deer in the headlights of a car, I sat there worrying how I might of potentially ruined a great opportunity to blag an easy way of making some money. For half an hour, he kept calling me, telling me to meet him in random places on the beach, when I finally found out where he was, he wanted me to drop the guys and go out with just him, his brother and MDG. I wasnt prepared to do that and so I left.
As I walked back to the group, The Russian wanted to go meet some of his friends, he was fed up with all this walking around after people and I hadnt even had a drink yet. I was close to tears and when the other two told us that they wanted to go to the strip of bars on the port, he told them we would meet up with them in half an hour.
We walked off and met his Swedish friend and his brother. All of a sudden I was standing with 7 tall, blond Swedish guys. The night had definately picked up, as The Russian spoke to them in Swedish, I wish I understood the language. He was born in Stockholm and Swedish was one of the four languages he spoke.It was just another thing to add to the long list that made him even more sexier. We went off to an after hours bar and sat next to each other, holding hands and staring at each other. The rest of the guys sat there drinking and smoking, TR whispered sweet nothings in my ear and as he saw the lust in my eyes, I reached out and kissed him.
I was melting again and I didnt know what to do next.